Sitting in front of the telly this evening, just about to press the play button and watch a recording from my TiVo, when I heard a noise. I looked up and there was that damn mouse on the window ledge! Right, I thought to myself, this is war Mr Mouse (in a non-violent way, of course). I want you out of my house!
So I grab the broom and cautiously move the curtains. The mouse leapt out from behind them, raced across the floor and underneath the couch. Okay. I moved the couch. He fled back to the curtain. I opened the front door and moved the curtain again. Nope, he wasn't going there. This went on for quite some time. My lounge room was starting to look like a disaster zone, with stuff piled on top of the couches and tables, but I was determined.
I opened the kitchen door and back door and eventually herded him in, shutting the door behind me so he couldn't get back into the lounge. Now where did that little beggar go now?!
Behind the fridge? Nope.
Behind the stove? Nope.
Behind the washing machine? Can't see you Mr Mouse....
So I stood there and I waited. And I waited... ah hah! A little rodent face peered out from beside the washing machine, spotted me and dived back for cover. Damn. Why won't he just go outside!!
I know he was scared, but I wasn't going to hurt him. I just wanted him and me to part company. Go find your own apartment!
Now where's he gone to? Not behind the washing machine any more. Hmmm, must be in the cupboard under the laundry tub. Yep, there you are you little varmint! Get outta here, shoo, scat, leave already!
Nope, he's not having any of it. Staying right there.
So I emptied the cupboard, bit by bit. Now he's vanished!
Okay, I'll wait. So I went out the back door to cool down and sure enough, after a while I spotted him sneaking out of the cupboard. But when I quietly went back inside, he's vanished again. Only place I can think he might be is inside the back of the fridge, cos I sure as heck shifted everything out and around in that kitchen!
By now it's getting late. I really really wanted to just have a quiet evening. Watch a bit of telly, wash my hair, go to bed early. But because of that pushy little mouse it's now 1.32am and I am still up. And he's still somewhere in my kitchen (door's shut of course and it's staying that way).
So what do I do now? How do I get rid of Mr Mouse in a nice way? I'm not into violence. I don't want him dead. I just want him gone!
Watch this space for the continuing saga of "The Unwanted Mouse Guest"...