Just Say No

Why do we say yes when we really want to say no? How often do you agree to do something that you just don't want to do? We tend to think that making our personal needs a priority makes us selfish, but we need to learn to put ourselves first once in a while. Learning to say no is one of the best things you can do to reduce stress in your life, and give yourself time for what’s really important.

Don’t say yes to anything you don’t want to do, even if you feel you should do it. You may feel guilty the first few times, but you aren't doing yourself or the person asking you any favours by agreeing to do something you don't want or don't have the time to do, because your heart won't be in it. People are always going to ask you to do things for them. That's life. Saying yes when you want to say no causes stress. C'mon, nobody's perfect, we're not superheroes! We can't do it all and not have a payback in the long run. That payback is often health problems caused by stress.

Ask yourself how you feel when someone asks you to take on yet another commitment? What's your first reaction? Do you truly want to do it or is it something you think you should do? The word "should” comes loaded with guilt, but guilt is anger turned inward because you can’t do what you really want to do.

Why is it so hard to say no? Because it often means saying no to good people you respect. But have you ever noticed that the more you say yes, the more people ask you to do? They aren't taking advantage of you - you're just not being smart.  You won't be letting them down, there are other people out there that can do it.

There are only so many hours in the day. Whatever you choose to do limits your ability to do other things. Learning to cut down the stress in your life by only doing the things you really enjoy doing - now that's smart.